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Articles Tagged Humor

  • Friday, May 16, 2014
    old soundman
    Old Soundman 05/16/14 02:07 PM,
    What’s wrong with this Steve guy? Here he has a lifestyle that 80 percent of humanity cannot even dream of achieving, and he wants to throw it all away. To be a soundman? He needs immediate assistance, won’t you help? For just $3.95 a month, I will send you color photos of Steve receiving many electroshock treatments, and having unfortunate and very serious side effects from various pharmaceutical medications. Thank you for calling 1-800-osm-4luv. Oh, his letter… Dear Old Soundman… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogBusinessEducationEngineerSound ReinforcementTechnician

  • Friday, April 11, 2014
    sound check
    Paul LaPlaca 04/11/14 04:43 PM,
    “Check one, two… one, two…” As a soundperson, I’ve had to repeat this phrase ad nauseam—at times I even hear it in my dreams. Everyone wants to know: “Why can’t you count to three?” To which the punch line follows: “Because on three, you have to lift.” Ugh, like I haven’t heard that a thousand times before. (In addition to “when will this be over” and “is that really necessary?”) Years of enduring these tired refrains finally prompted me to… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogStudy HallConsolesEngineerMicrophoneProcessorSound ReinforcementStage

  • Friday, April 04, 2014
    old soundman
    Old Soundman 04/04/14 01:02 PM,
    Dear OSM: I’ve read your articles with great amusement, and have always admired your witty yet direct prose. Go to the head of the class – flattery wins, every time! I hope you can help me with a small predicament. I’m the monitor engineer for a reasonably successful rock band that uses in-ear monitoring systems… If you’re working, that’s always good, compared to the alternative. …and I’m fortunate enough to be able to carry my own console and a small… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogStudy HallBusinessEngineerProcessorSound Reinforcement

  • Tuesday, April 01, 2014
    PSW Staff 04/01/14 12:17 PM,
    Sensaphonics has announced its expansion into the field of custom eye protection with the introduction of the 3D 20/20, the world’s first Active Ambient Optical Protection System. The system is designed to control the harmful rays from concert lighting systems, eliminating the strobing and glare that can cause headaches or even seizures among musicians and audience members alike. “The 3D-20/20 is, quite simply, a game-changing product,” explains Sensaphonics founder and president, Dr. Michael Santucci. “We’ve all been to concerts where… View this story
    Filed in: AVLive SoundFeatureNewsProductAVSound ReinforcementStage

  • lectrosonics
    PSW Staff 04/01/14 07:28 AM,
    In the great tradition of Heathkit®, Dynaco®, and Eico®, Lectrosonics is introducing user-assembled kits as a cost-saving alternative to its popular (and pre-assembled) SRb Series dual-channel receivers. The kits reduce the cost versus finished products by approximately 50 percent. Along with saving money, users can enjoy the exciting challenge of sorting, correctly identifying, placing and soldering all the tiny parts—over 1,100 in all! The SR Series Digital Hybrid Wireless® diversity receivers offer two independent channels and fit into the standard… View this story
    Filed in: AVLive SoundFeatureNewsProductAVMicrophoneWireless

  • Friday, March 14, 2014
    Peter Mapp 03/14/14 01:03 PM,
    Editor’s Note: I ran across the following while reading through some old SynAudCon newsletters. My thanks to Peter for allowing us to share it with you here. As Pat Brown of SynAudCon noted, “These are for real - there are people out there that really believe them. This makes for good job security for all of us!” 1. Sound systems always feed back at 400 Hz. 2. Sound systems only feed back at the frequencies indicated on the graphic equalizer.… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogMeasurementProcessorSignal

  • Wednesday, January 29, 2014
    live sound
    Craig Leerman 01/29/14 04:21 PM,
    Like many professions, the pro audio business has a language all its own, with numerous unique words and phrases to describe job titles, equipment, and some of the things we use and do. Here are some examples of this distinctive lingo: Battens: Long horizontal pipes found in theatres that are used for hanging curtains and scenery. They always seem to be in an optimized lowered position so we can hit our heads of them during load-in and load-out.  Biscuit: A… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogProductionAudioBusinessEducationSound ReinforcementSystem

  • Tuesday, December 10, 2013
    line arrays
    Gary Gand 12/10/13 08:20 AM,
    Attention shoppers: the good news is that in this century, there is very little bad sound equipment. There are still plenty of bad engineers (not enough sleep and too much fun) and bad combinations of gear (70-volt clusters and powered mixers driving powered loudspeakers). But the stuff coming out of the factories - and even a lot of the proprietary (home brew) gear - is light years beyond the stuff we all got stuck with in the past. A not-so-famous… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogOpinionStudy HallBusinessEducationLine ArraySound ReinforcementSystem

  • Friday, October 11, 2013
    old soundman
    Old Soundman 10/11/13 01:53 PM,
    Dear Old Soundman— Yes, SPA1! Were your parents named SPA.09? I’ve enjoyed reading your comments for some time now. See, even though you have named yourself after a decadent outdoor love tub, you’re okay! I wonder if you might give us your insight regarding musicians who use earplugs (sometimes very sophisticated earplugs,) but then require ridiculous monitor levels on stage. There was a lack of love in these people’s lives when they were children. I run into more problems with… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogOpinionAnalogEducationEngineerMixerMonitoringSignalSound ReinforcementSystem

  • Wednesday, September 04, 2013
    Frederick Ampel 09/04/13 06:16 PM,
    Editor’s Note: Nothing discussed here is true… Right? :>) Check any good handbook of physical constants and you will find that silver has much lower resistivity than copper. In fact, silver has the lowest resistivity of anything that is solid at room temperature, and is thus suitable for making wires. However, the practical solution is to use thicker copper. Still, to avoid the debilitating nature of skin effects, the best solution is to use silver plated copper wire.  Of course,… View this story
    Filed in: AVFeatureBlogAVInterconnect