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Articles Tagged Humor

  • Wednesday, November 04, 2015
    Keith Clark 11/04/15 07:18 AM,
    Karl Winkler’s reference to “great quotes” in his recent column (here) got me thinking about the many (too many to count, in fact) insightful comments that have appeared on the pages of ProSoundWeb and Live Sound International over the years. It lead to a weekend of reading more than a hundred archived articles, and from them, I’ve drawn the following quotes about the world of pro audio. “People don’t come to hear me mix, they come to hear the act.… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogStudy HallBusinessConcertEngineerMonitoringSound ReinforcementTechnician

  • Monday, November 02, 2015
    old soundman
    Old Soundman 11/02/15 07:25 AM,
    Dear OSM: I’m wondering if you have had this question before… Probably, but go ahead. … I work for a local company with dreams of going regional/national… You have something in common with many fellow Americans! And foreigners too! … although my employer never seems to get the gigs. See, you have even more in common with many audio servants! As well as people all over who work for caterers, Top-40 bands, laser companies, gardening services, and of course, the… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureProductionAudioBusinessEngineerSound Reinforcement

  • Tuesday, October 13, 2015
    Craig Leerman 10/13/15 06:25 AM,
    I was recently working a stage at a local festival in Vegas. There were many other performers, some on small stages and some just walking around. While out on a food run, I ran into a large crowd watching a performance and stopped to take a look. It was a Native American puppeteer dressed in cowboy-style clothing, operating a marionette designed to look Native American and dressed in traditional costume, complete with a big feather headdress. And the guy was… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogOpinionBusinessEngineerSound ReinforcementStageTechnician

  • Friday, September 18, 2015
    Dave Rat 09/18/15 03:37 PM,
    As technology accelerates at a dizzying rate and increases in processing power are only rivaled by the size of knobs on “retro analog” gear, we find ourselves navigating between magical-designer patch cables and legitimate advances in audio. We know digital must always be “better” because CDs sound better than cassette tapes. Everything is processed, as often as possible, and just as the hot dog is the perfect meal of processed meat, sound will be perfect and consistent any day now,… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogConcertEducationEngineerSound ReinforcementTechnician

  • Saturday, September 05, 2015
    old soundman
    Old Soundman 09/05/15 11:22 AM,
    Dear Old Soundman: I don’t have a nickname. How do I get one? Do I need one? Sincerely, Scohen Dude! You absolutely need one! Everybody needs one! How about if I call you “Sco”? That is what aspiring young “yo-cat” fusion musicians at the Berklee School of Music in the 80s called guitarist John Scofield. These are the same obsessive characters who smugly referred to Charlie Parker as “Bird” and John Coltrane as “Trane,” and sat around discussing “Chick” and… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogOpinionBusinessEducationEngineerSound ReinforcementTechnician

  • Thursday, August 06, 2015
    Curt Taipale 08/06/15 06:36 AM,
    This article is provided by Church   It’s clear to us that God’s laws of physics must operate differently inside a church than outside. After several moments of grueling research, painstaking addition, and… Well, we offer these amendments. Regrettably, they are true stories passed along by members of our ChurchSoundcheck Discussion Group. They arrived via email, so you know they’re true! Amendment #1: We’ve been pointing microphones in the wrong direction! A friend of ours went into church early… View this story
    Filed in: Church SoundFeatureBlogProductionAudioBusinessEducationInstallationStageSystem

  • Monday, August 03, 2015
    Old Soundman 08/03/15 07:18 AM,
    Here’s one of those situations that make you wonder about your career choice or where you are in your life path. Pay close attention, our buddy Brian is showing us how to keep the disgustedness in check and not resort to a brick through the front window of this fine establishment… Dear OSM: O.K., try this one out… Hit me with it, Bri! Let me have it! You just found out the band you regularly mix for has a gig… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureProductionAudioConcertInstallationInterconnectLoudspeakerMixerSignalSound ReinforcementSystem

  • Friday, July 24, 2015
    Jon Tidey 07/24/15 07:28 AM,
    This article is provided by Audio Geek Zine.   Recently I asked my Twitter followers to complete and RT the phrase “You’re not a real audio engineer until you’ve ____” It was a lot of fun to see the replies. I didn’t really expect serious answers. theaudiogeek: You’re not a real audio engineer until you’ve made your own cables. timgosden: You’re not a real audio engineer until you’ve become a coffee snob. SmallRoomStudio: You’re not a real audio engineer until… View this story
    Filed in: RecordingFeaturePollEngineerStudio

  • Monday, July 06, 2015
    old soundman
    PSW Staff 07/06/15 12:55 PM,
    I don’t think this note is from the original LL Cool J. This other LL we have here needs to learn that you can’t put 100 prisoners in a correctional system bus made for 40. Watch as I reason gently with him … Dear Old Soundman— Welcome, LL! Please help. I currently run sound for an eight-piece group that includes a three-piece horn section. My problem is not getting a good clear sound; either I get the rhythm section to… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogOpinionProductionAudioBusinessEngineerSound ReinforcementTechnician

  • Monday, June 29, 2015
    Sully 06/29/15 05:04 AM,
    “Here…these are for you. “Let me count that back - One (1) pair floppy plaid shoes; one (1) Bravo-52 latex red rubber nose (with custom strap); two (2) mechanical chickens with servo-waste evacuation system; and three and a half (3 1/2) cans of I told you so (generic substitute). “I must ask you to put on these garments, pick up the chickens and proceed about your business until load out. “This demand is in accordance with our technical rider, which… View this story
    Filed in: Live SoundFeatureBlogStudy HallEngineerLoudspeakerMeasurementSignalSound ReinforcementSystemTechnician

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