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GIRLFRIENDS AND WAGERING
Our new pal Dan is getting hassled by the significant others of the
musicians he mixes. While a veteran soundman named Marc is pushing his
luck …
Hey OSM
HEY DAN!
Yoko Onos. You know what I mean, I'm sure everyone who has sat behind
a sound board knows what I mean. The know-it-all girl friends of the
prima-donna lead singers.
OH, YES. AND REALLY, THEY CAN BE THE GIRLFRIEND OF ANY BAND MEMBER.
HER GUY IS ALWAYS NOT LOUD ENOUGH IN THE MIX.
BUT A WORD OF CAUTION, DAN. PLEASE DO NOT LIBEL YOKO ONO.
I KNOW THAT IT IS TEMPTING TO BLAME HER FOR THE BEATLES BREAKING UP,
BUT I DON’T THINK THAT’S FAIR.
YOU HAVE TO ADMIT THAT JOHN LENNON DID SOME OF HIS BEST WORK WHEN HE
WAS LIVING WITH HER, IN THE LAST FEW YEARS BEFORE HE DIED.
ALSO, HOW ABOUT THE TWO OF THEM APPEARING ON BEHALF OF JOHN SINCLAIR?
THAT WAS RIGHTEOUS.
AH, YOU’RE PROBABLY NOT OLD ENOUGH TO REMEMBER THAT. YOU PROBABLY
DON’T EVEN KNOW WHO JOHN SINCLAIR IS.
You have to be nice to them because they are the loudmouths throughout
the show telling everyone how crappy the sound is. You try not to make
eye contact with them but, you can see them coming, marching across
the dance floor to tell you something like, "Turn up the monitors,
I hear him really pushing his voice."
THAT’S A NEW ONE ON ME.
I CAN HONESTLY SAY I HAVE NEVER HEARD THAT.
IN MY EXPERIENCE, GIRLFRIENDS HAVE ALWAYS COMMENTED ON THE HOUSE MIX.
I try to keep a professional attitude around the band and client,
but after her third or fourth visit I just wanna flip out.
HAVE ANOTHER BEER, DAN, OR A JACK AND COKE, OR WHATEVER YOU PREFER.
I DON’T WANT TO SEEM TO BE PROMOTING THE USE OF ALCOHOL, BUT IT
CAN OFTEN BE A LIFESAVER IN THOSE KIND OF SITUATIONS.
BUT WATCH OUT THAT YOU DON’T DRINK TOO MUCH AND TELL HER WHAT
YOU REALLY THINK OF HER. THAT COULD LEAD TO YOU LOSING YOUR POSITION
WITH HER BOYFRIEND’S BAND.
Most of the time it sounds great, but a great night can quickly turn
into a nightmare with Yoko lurking in the shadows.
Thanks
Dan
AH, DAN, MY YOUNG FRIEND. TRY AND KEEP THINGS UNDER CONTROL AND YOU
MAY LAST AS LONG AS MYSELF, OR MARC HERE …
OSM,
HOWDY, PARTNER!
I am an OSM too, about 20 years into this roller coaster ride to
wherever its heading...
GLAD TO HEAR IT.
WHEN YOU FIND OUT, LET ME KNOW, OKAY?
You opinions and philosophy remind me of the guys in our little sound
community. We have a couple of guys that might even be older than you,
but I'm not putting any of *my* money on that.
YOU ARE A WISE MAN NOT TO WAGER.
I’LL BET YOU DON’T EVEN PLAY THE KENO IN THOSE FREEWAY RESTAURANTS
IN NEVADA, DO YOU?
THE FEDS HAVE OUTLAWED EPHEDRINE, SO YOU CAN’T GET ANY MORE OF
THOSE HAPPY PILLS THERE, EITHER. IT’S BEST FOR YOU TO STOP DOING
THEM, ANYWAY, MARC.
Just wondering where in this great land you and your club are located
(geographically speaking)? If you are close, a road trip might be in
order, maybe not...
Thanks for your time.
Best Regards,
Marc
I CAN SEE YOU ARE A BUDDY OF SUNIL’S.
I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS ARE THINKING.
ANONYMOUS. IT’S A SIMPLE WORD. WHY DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND
IT? IF I TELL ONE PERSON WHO I AM, OR WHERE I LIVE, THEN THE WHOLE WORLD
WILL FIND OUT!
I REALLY ENJOY THE FACT THAT SOME VERY PROMINENT PEOPLE TEAR THEIR HAIR
OUT TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHO I AM.
HINT: I AM NOT DOUG FOWLER, EVEN THOUGH THERE ARE THOSE THAT ARE ABSOLUTELY
CONVINCED THAT I AM.
STAY OUT OF MY CLUB, MARC!
OR, BETTER YET, COME THROUGH AND DO A SHOW, AND THEN LEAVE WITHOUT RECOGNIZING
THAT I AM ME.
MAYBE YOU ALREADY HAVE!
LUV –
- THE OLD SOUNDMAN
