Hey OSM,

HEY, PAL.

I'll get right to the point since I know you must be busy watching "Baywatch" reruns.

YOU KNOW DARN WELL THAT I’M WATCHING HOWARD STERN’S “SON OF A BEACH!”

"BAYWATCH?" HOW DARE YOU!

YOU WORK FOR HASSELHOFF, DON’T YOU?

I've been doing sound for about 13 years, and in that time I've seen amps bridged to mono on more than one occasion. Most often powering the subs. So the other day I'm talking with a friend of mine, and a buddy of his (another sound guy), and this buddy says "Oh no, never bridge the amps to mono, it's bad for them." What the f?

LANGUAGE, ROB, LANGUAGE! IT’S OBVIOUS THAT YOU LISTEN TO HOWARD, AND HOW HE IS ALWAYS GOING ON ABOUT HOW HE WANTS TO “F” THIS OR THAT CELEBRITY GUEST.

BUT LET’S GET BACK TO AUDIO, SHALL WE?

This guy is more into the nuts and bolts than I am, he's the kind of guy who sleeps with his multimeter, but I'm left thinking that he's a few coupons short of a toaster.

THIS IS YOUR LAST WARNING, ROB.

OSM = FUNNY STUFF.

ROB = HUMBLE AUDIO QUESTIONS. PERIOD.

As far as I know, and I'm sure you'll correct me if I'm wrong,

YOU GOT THAT RIGHT!

bridging just takes a single input and sends it to both sides of an amp (reversing the phase going to the "B" side). You then connect your speakers to the hots on the two outputs and, voila, you're off to the races.

IF YOU DON’T WATCH OUT, I AM GOING TO ASSIGN YOU A MULTI-PAGE ESSAY ON “WHAT DALE EARNHARDT MEANT TO ME.” YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN TO THE RACES IN YOUR LIFE, AM I RIGHT? YOU GO INTO SOME CASINO IN RENO, AND JUST WATCH THE BIG SCREENS IN THEIR SPORTS BOOK ROOMS. YOU EAT THE SALMONELLA BUFFET, AND YOU PLAY THE SLOTS.

YOU SICK FREAK, ROB!

Is this really so much different than sending a signal to each side of the amp in stereo mode?’

YOU MEAN LIKE WITH AN XLR “Y” CABLE, CHAMP?

OR DO YOU MEAN “REGULAR” REGULAR STEREO?

HEY, DO YOU KNOW ABOUT MY ZDM PROTOCOL, ZONED DUAL MONO?

Each side is still getting a signal and amplifying it, the only
real difference is how the speakers are connected, right? Or am
I missing something so blatantly obvious that I'm going to want
to impale myself on a steak knife when I read your answer?

Rob

THE IMPALING SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD WAY TO GO.

YOU KNOW THE NICKNAME OF A VERY FAMOUS ALLEGED VAMPIRE (OR WAMPEER,) IN EASTERN EUROPE, WAS A PERSON ONLY SLIGHTLY MORE DISTURBED THAN YOU, CALLED VLAD THE IMPALER!

CARRY ON THE TRADITION, ROB, ONLY INTRODUCE THE NEW MILLENIUM TWIST OF DOING IT TO YOURSELF VOLUNTARILY, RATHER THAN HAVING IT DONE TO YOU!

WILL YOU PUT MORE FAITH IN THE WORD OF THE GREAT DAVE RAT THAN THAT OF AN OLD MAN LIKE ME? DAVE HAS A METHOD THAT HE USES, PERHAPS THAT WILL SHUT YOU UP.

http://www.prosoundweb.com/live/articles/daverat/amptricks.shtml

HE IS EVEN SO GRACIOUS AS TO FIRST LAY OUT SOME BASIC AMP THEORY. IT SEEMS THAT YOU VERY BADLY NEED TO, AS MY FATHER (THE VERY OLD SOUNDMAN) USED TO SAY, “BRUSH UP ON THAT.”

MY OWN AMP THEORY IS SIMPLE.

BIG KNOBS? TURN THEM TO THE RIGHT, SPEAKERS GET NICE AND LOUD. TURN THEM ALL THE WAY TO THE LEFT, YOU GET NOTHING.

RED LIGHTS ON THE BEAT, FOR JUST A MOMENT, NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. RED LIGHT GO ON AND STAY ON? AMP IS NOW BOAT ANCHOR.

DO YOU THINK I’VE NEVER USED ONE FOR JUST THAT PURPOSE?

LIKE THEY SAY ON RICKI LAKE, YOU DON’T KNOW ME!

LUV –

THE OLD SOUNDMAN

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