The Short Version

If you're like me and don't like to read long-winded, tech-heavy articles, but want to know more about someone's experience with the SpectraFoo audio software, do yourself a favor and stop reading after the next line. SpectraFoo rocks, order it now!

Hear No Evil

OK, for everyone else, I hope you’re sitting down, because do I have a story to tell. As a live sound engineer for over 20 years, I have seen and heard so much that I've forgotten more shows than I can remember. Since 1995, I have been the front of house engineer for the Grammy-nominated Marcia Ball Band. That position puts me in front of over 150 different sound systems every year.

From huge outdoor festivals to smoke-filled blues bars, I get to do them all and the sound systems run the full spectrum as well. One night it may be the world class VDOSC system, with a sharp professional crew, and the next night it's an in-house P.A. that is so out of phase with itself that I'm surprised it doesn't just implode into another dimension (or at least directly into the dumpster in the parking lot!)

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And don't get me started on some of these self-proclaimed "house soundmen" of the recurring audio nightmares, or how some club owners always manage to put the mixing console in the worst possible position in the room. Or why some venues proudly advertise themselves as the best place to see live music, but fail to mention that it's also the worst place to "hear" live music. For now, let's talk about my experience with SpectraFoo.

And The T-shirt Is Free …

I carry my Macintosh Powerbook G3 laptop in a shiny aluminum Halliburton briefcase, it's the home of of my copy of SpectraFoo. A few years ago I decided that I had to have a Powerbook while on the road for internet access. Then I started looking for a real-time analyzer program to load into the laptop, hoping to use it in my work. After searching the internet for any freeware analyzer software and talking to a few audio software salesmen, I found out that I had limited choices for an inexpensive straight ahead realtime analyzer. I had heard about SpectraFoo, but I found the $1000 retail price to be too expensive since I had just spent $3500 on the top of the line Powerbook.

So I started calling the large discount music stores around my home state of Texas for the best deal on any other audio software. Don't get me wrong, I make a good living, but I just love to bargain shop. If there is a great deal out there I will find it. In my pursuit of this unknown software, the name SpectraFoo kept coming up again and again, so as not to be stubborn when reality starts banging on my head, I began looking into what the big deal was all about. The more I dug, the more I started hearing about features like a Phase-Torch Frequency Sensitive Phase Meter (yeah, like I said, what the hell does that do?) but it was the audio spectrum analyzer in this program that I was more interested in.

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Yes, yes, OK, I did hear about the "Smaart" software, but if it was so smart, why won't it load into my Mac laptop without having to buy even more software to make it work? So to make a long story even longer, I set out to find the "sweet deal" on this Foo thing. You know, talk to a couple of salesmen and see who will outbid who ... it all seemed so easy, and I was ready to spend some hard-earned cash.

I already had a telephone rap going with this one salesman at a large chain music store up in Dallas, so I asked him "what's your bottom dollar? I'm ready to buy today". He says 30% off retail, and since he knew that I was still shopping, he added, "If you get a better deal, you just let me know". So I'm off in search of a better deal. I'm thinking, "Hey, stop screwing around, why not just call the makers of SpectraFoo direct?", so I do, and that's when the foo hit the fan. I get a rep on the line at Metric Halo, the makers of SpectraFoo, and we start talking about the product. I don't start talking money just yet, got to be cool you know, but I know that I'm ready to buy.

The first curve is thrown by the rep. He says that there is a free ten-day full working software download of SpectraFoo on their web site. And because I'm a working professional with a kinda high profile job, he will give me 35% off retail. I said I'd get back to him and I go on line to get that free download.

The first show with SpectraFoo was a bit overwhelming. The software is giving you so much information that you have to figure out what the heck it's trying to say, sort of like Lassie barking at you and not knowing if he's saying that little Timmy fell in the well again or that aliens have landed the the cornfield. You must learn to hear with your eyes. Also, you have to buy a measurement microphone so the program can listen to the audio. After the ten day trial download ran out, I was hooked, this program was far more than imagined. I thought, "I must buy this software. It is so cool, even if I don’t know how to use all its features yet."

So I call back the salesman in Dallas, to see if he wants to give me a better deal than the rep at Metric Halo, and he says he will call me back in a few minutes. He calls me back after he himself called Metric Halo and now he says he cannot sell me the software at anything but full retail, so I call back the rep at Metric Halo and tell him that I’m ready to take him up on his offer. Then he asks me if I had tried to buy the software from a Dallas music store. I said yes, sure I did, I was shopping for the best deal. Well, it seems that the first salesman called Metric Halo to see what their wholesale price on the software was, and mentioned the second rep's offer of 35% off retail. I don't know all the details, but the second rep got in trouble with his manager for offering the software to me at a discount, and now the rep was angry at me for going over his head and getting him in trouble.

I tried to explain that I was just trying to get the best price but that I loved the product, but he said the deal was off and if I wanted SpectraFoo, I had to pay full retail! In my mind I thought, "nobody pays full retail!" I again said I was sorry if he was upset, but I didn't mean for anyone to get in trouble. He said that what I did was very uncool and the 35% off deal he offered me was not going to happen. I had to think fast, so I said I'd call him back in an hour or two. He was upset and I was confused. I thought the best thing was for us to cool down and get back to the negotiations after we had time to see how silly it had all become.

At 35% off retail, the money I would have saved would buy me that measurement mic that I talked about earlier, if I could convince the rep that I was only doing what I think everyone should do when buying an expensive product: shop around. Also, I thought about how out of control the deal had gone and I figured that after an hour or so we could talk about it and come to an understanding. After all, I was going to be using it out in the field and countless people would see and ask about the product, if only because it is one flashy show piece. I was, in a way, doing real time demos of their product in big time settings.

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I called the rep back and did my best to soothe the situation. He asked me what I would do for him and I promised that I would tell anyone that asked about the software, where to get it, how to use it, and would give them his name and a phone number to contact him directly. Without hesitation he said no deal, full retail or nothing. At that moment I saw red. Now I was upset that we could not work at even a measly 10% off. It just wasn't fair.

But what are ya gonna do? He had me by the faders. Was it better for me to curse his very existance, hang up and say goodbye to what I knew was the perfect software for my job? I had used that software for ten days and was completly hooked! But he wouldnt change his mind. Grudgingly I gave in and gave him my credit card number. He said thanks, and that he would throw in a free T- shirt. I bit my tongue.

Just Doing My Job, Ma'am!

I had to tell that story first, in order for you to understand that this is not a fluff piece written by some butt-kissing ad writer, or by someone that got this software for free in exchange for a good review. No, I got this the hard way, with a reprimand and the penance of paying the full retail price. I have every reason to slam my experience with SpectraFoo, but I can't. I can't because this software has made my job easier and more enjoyable. SpectraFoo has helped me sharpen my ears and fine-tune every sound system I work with. I am a better sound engineer because SpectraFoo shows me what I am listening to.

SpectraFoo has helped me avoid sonic catastrophe and taught me to tweak a sound system to its full potential. SpectraFoo will help you ring out your monitors and equalize a sound system to the hall. SpectraFoo has all the tools to help you find the problems in the sound system you work with and help you fix it. Everyone will love that, especially the audience that listens to it and the musicans that perform through it.

It's been over a year and I have used SpectraFoo for hundreds of sound checks and shows. I've done countless demos for audio personnel, from studio recording engineers to monitor and front of house operators that flock around my laptop for a better look at the stunning visual representation of sound, and I tell them all the same thing: SpectraFoo rocks!

By the way, I did keep my promise to that rep at Metric Halo when I said that I would show and tell SpectraFoo to anyone that asked and have given out his name and phone number every time. If you don’t believe me call Metric Halo at (888) 638-4527 (USA only) - the rest of the world is (845) 831-8600 - and ask for Dan, extension 203. Tell him Johnny sent you, and by the way, ask him to explain what the Phase-Torch Frequency Sensitive Phase Meter does.

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You can check out Metric Halo on the Web at:

http://www.mhlabs.com/

or go directly to their demo download page:

http://www.mhlabs.com/demo/


Editor’s note: For me, this is one of the best real-world stories we have posted in the PSW live section this year, and I hope everyone else enjoys reading it half as much as I did. You got yer audio, you got yer business negotiating, yer basic conflict’n’resolution, the classic elements are all there. Johnny is quite a storyteller. Thanks, man!

- C.K.