Musician Jokes

What's the difference between a piano accordian and a cajun accordian?
The cajun accordian burns a little faster.

If you drop an accordion, a set of bagpipes and a viola off a 20-story building, which one lands first?
Who cares?

What's the difference between an Uzi and an accordion?
The Uzi stops after 20 rounds.

What do you call ten accordians at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start.

What's a bassoon good for?
Kindling for an accordion fire.

What's a accordion good for?
Learning how to fold a map.

What do you call a group of topless female accordian players?
Ladies in Pain

Bumper Stickers:
1. Play an accordian--go to jail!
2. Three rows and you're out!

Minimum safe distances between street musicians and the public:

* Violinist: 25 feet
* Bad Violinist: 50 feet
* Tone Deaf Guitar Player who knows 3 chords: 75 feet
* 15 year-old Electric Guitar Player with Nirvana fixation: 100 feet
* Accordionist: 60 miles

"Welcome to Heaven: Here's your harp.
Welcome to Hell: Here's your accordion."
Credit to Gary Larson.

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We will strive to to make you laugh.